I Will Always Struggle With This.
Those of you that knew taking a two week break from working out was a bad idea, raise your hand. I’m raising my hand. It was the the worst Idea I’ve had since starting my blog. I honestly felt it was the right decision. It was supposed to be a way for my body to prepare for a pregnancy. Unfortunately, it did more harm than good. Not working out has made it more difficult to get back into my routine. I’ve mentioned my issue with this in my Staying Active post. You’d think I would’ve learned my lesson by now, obviously I haven’t.
I’m still making the effort to walk two times a week for about an hour and a half, and I dance with Emerald in the morning; It’s become a regular thing now. We pick up toys and I make the bed before she jumps all over our sheets. I love listening to music when I clean so I’ll put Pandora on the speaker box and we just dance our little booties off. But that’s as far as I go. No more squats or lunges, I haven’t done one plank in I don’t know how long. It’s really sad to see all of my progress disappear. The good news is that I’m not gaining any weight, so that’s the upside to being in my first trimester. But I still look in the mirror and criticize myself for not doing more. On top of being anxious about being pregnant in my first trimester, I can add being negative about my body (which is affecting my self esteem) to the list of what not to do when you’re trying to conceive.
I have been super tired the past few weeks. It’s to the point where any activity I try to do, I completely drain every ounce of energy I have. I can’t even go up and down the stairs without being out of breath. All I want to do is sleep and I would, if I didn’t have a toddler jumping all over me telling me “mommy, wake up.” I have been pretty lucky, Emerald is right by side when we take two hour naps, so I’m thankful for that. I keep wondering if this exhaustion is normal because I can’t remember feeling this tired when I was pregnant with my daughter. It could be that I had no choice, I was working at the time so I didn’t have a bed staring at me all day. There are some days I get a mini break from being exhausted but those are pretty rare. I wake up all rested and all I want to do is clean everything, workout, and go shopping. It’s as though my body is begging for some sort of activity, anything to get me moving, but that lasts about an hour. I make breakfast and after we eat I’m ready for a two hour nap. The fatigue is real.
Another reason why I kind of slowed down is I want to be sure the types of exercise that I’m use to doing are safe for pregnancy. Pregnancy is so complex. There’s so much going on right now that pushing your body too far can disrupt or even damage this delicate process. I notice when I do squats my lower stomach aches right after and it takes a minute for the discomfort to go away. That can be a little concerning. Also, I’ve noticed that I’m out of breath shortly after I start my routine and I’m not sure if that should be happening this is normal in early pregnancy. As worried as I am about being safe, I understand that exercise is very important during pregnancy. I know I need to get back into it and eventually I will, even if it’s a little at a time.
This has and always will be a struggle for me. But I am determined to work towards my goal, even if I hit a few bumps along the way. There are so many hours in a day, and like most mamas I try to do as much as I can in those days. From taking care of a toddler, hopefully growing a new life inside my belly, to making sure that our household is running smoothly (even if I haven’t taken the husbands work shirts to the cleaners), and after all of that still try and fit in workouts. I’m trying my hardest and sometimes I fall short but it doesn’t mean I’ll stop trying. If you’re like me and you struggle with working out, know that I’m right there with you.